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Diiiiiiiiiiiick! [04 Aug 2012|03:54pm]
I seem to be massively feeding some people's ego trips right now. Enough.
1 Ow! That fucking hurt| Bite Me!

This shit is B.A.N.A.N.A.S. [23 Jul 2012|09:34pm]

Hope the few remaining stragglers on here are doing okay! I've been keeping as up to date as possible with all your goings-on.

In a nutshell:
Work appraisal on Thursday. Not sure if boss likes me that much but hopefully that won't affect her assessment of my performance. I really enjoy the job and it's refreshing not to be constantly looking for other things that are better-suited to me. I really want to do well with this. Fingers crossed.

As for the whole boy situation - I really could have done with a simple deal right now (if anything - I was fairly happy single). And i still am single technically. But I seem to have found someone fairly wonderful, we've become very close very quickly. And he's not ready for anything formal/serious/exclusive due to some pretty screwed baggage he's carrying around - and I'm fine with that. Up until recently I felt the same, but some slightly concerning feelings are rearing their stupid idiot heads. It's a terribly complicated but, for now, quite fun affair, and I feel like it's under control. When I feel like it isn't I'll deal with it. As usual timing's all skewed on both sides. Flippin' timing. Flippin' boys.

Nothing else really to report. Bit worried about Nick at the moment, but I hope that's unfounded.

Overall: I'm alright!

Soooooooo... How's about you guys?

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.

Bite Me!

Bit shit [22 Dec 2008|01:11am]
Dave and I split up today.

It feels like a bit of a temporary thing at the moment, just to get our heads cleared up. But I still have to come to terms with the fact that we may never get back together.

It's been over 2 years and most of that time has been brilliant. But for whatever reason we don't seem to be making each other as happy as we once did.

I'm not going to lie - I'm pretty much devastated about it. But we've agreed we'll always be in each other's lives no matter what happens.

We're amazingly amicable about it all. I almost want him to have done something really bad so I can feel something other than sad and empty. It's not really like breaking up with someone - it's more like grieving...

Hmmm....cheery!

Anyway, if anyone wants to do something fun and distracting over the next couple of weeks, I'd definitely be up for it. x
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[22 Aug 2008|11:17pm]
Well, this is a fun game!Collapse )
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Change of plan... [12 Jun 2008|05:15pm]
Ok. Reeeeeeeally feel as though I've neglected LJ this time. I'm so sorry Livejournal. I *will* make it up to you. (I so won't.)

Nothing really that new going on, except for being about to quit my midwifery course for a number of reasons which I can almost be arsed going into, but not quite.

I'm not feeling too bad about it. I know I thought it was my vocation in life, but there was no way of knowing that for sure until I actually got stuck in and did it, and I've found it's not for me. Some people will assume that it was harder work than I expected and I just can't hack it. That isn't the case. Everyone who's seen me a lot recently will know that I've gone into this whole-heartedly and really given it a good go. I've kept on top of all the academic work and I've managed to gain loads of clinical skills on my placement too. I've even been a student rep for the past 2 months (which is so unbelievably unlike me it's untrue - note to self: too many uns...)! I know that if I put my mind to it, I'm quite capable of doing it. But my heart just isn't in it anymore, and if it isn't after 3 months I doubt I'll have miraculously found it again after 3 years of training.

I'm the kind of person who needs to take everything into consideration and seek differing views before making a decision, and being a midwife means that often goes out of the window and you have to think spontaneously, on your feet. This can result in potentially life-endangering mistakes. I thought I'd be able to adapt to that, but I'm really not sure I could cope with that pressure. Also, in my placement, I've seen from other midwives what consequences those mistakes have. A lot of them are really unfair - the top dogs get away with a lot and all the blame lands on the midwife's shoulders, whether it's her fault or not. I just don't know if I want to work in an environment where you don't trust anyone and you're constantly looking over your shoulder and covering your back. Obviously that's only a tiny part of the job, but there's still something about midwifery that makes me feel like I don't belong there.

I have really enjoyed the course so far and I know I'll value these experiences for the rest of my life but there are aspects of the job and the NHS which I know I just couldn't handle and I'd end up looking to do something different anyway so, after careful deliberation, I think it's best just to cut my losses before I get myself into any more NHS Bursary debt (on top of my student loan debt I already had, gulp!).

Next step - earn some money (to pay off aforesaid debts) and go and get some work experience in schools to see if I want to get into primary teaching. If I'm being honest, I think I just want to be able to eat custard daily again.

Last day of hospital placement tomorrow (I still haven't told anyone I want to leave) and then leaving for Ireland on Saturday for a week. May post photos. But I might not. Watch this space. Or don't.

Missing you all. How are you????!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

xxxx
5 Ow! That fucking hurts| Bite Me!

Anyone out there? [21 Feb 2008|01:12pm]
I've come out of hibernation to let everyone know that I do still read this from time to time, so if you're planning on taking me off your friends' lists then I will be very upset indeed if you do.

How are you all???

Also, I'VE PASSED MY DRIVING TEST!!!! Only the 3rd attempt.... ahem. Very pleased as it was my goal to pass the test before I start my Midwifery course and I have (just).

Next stop - buying a car and insurance that doesn't bankrupt me for the rest of my life. Any suggestions?

Dave is moving to Manchester in under 2 weeks which is MAMMOTH! I'm very excited but also quite scared. He's provisionally (that's the first time in ages I've said that word without thinking about failing driving tests!) moving in with me for a few weeks with the intention of moving somewhere else but if it goes ok he might stay here indefinitely!!! A big step but one which I hope we're near enough ready for. Plus Kate's still living here and she can act as a sort of buffer. It'll be more like a house-share rather than a CO-HABITATION!! I like describing my sister as a buffer. I think she suits it.

I'm hoping to have some kind of Welcome to Manchester celebration for him so that he doesn't suddenly want to turn around and go back to his stinky pub job. I'll keep everyone posted. Keep an eye on Facebook!

Other news - have been going to a lot more pub quizzes of late and have found that I can only really answer the questions to do with really bad 90s pop and French.
I've also spent far too much on Midwifery books. Just how many pictures of crowning vaginas does a woman need?!?!
I also want to go on holiday in the summer, perhaps to Morocco. It will be awesome.

Nothing else to say really. Boring!
Lots of love x
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Still alive, just. [23 Jun 2007|05:34pm]
I'm coming out of my university-shaped obsessed-with-Facebook-and-nothing-else cave to dust off this thing.

Notable Recent Events
- Turned 22. Already noticing considerable sagging and wrinkles. Only a matter of time now before Botox starts calling me.

- Did my exams and panicked before the last one convinced I knew nothing and had wasted my final year. Pretty silly since I'd already done most of my degree and this last exam was worth about 5% in total. I cried down the phone to practically my entire family and lost myself in a pile of snotty tissues. Got an early night, woke up and miraculously I'd remembered a lot of stuff. I guess everything really does seem better in the morning.

- Got a 2:1. Huzzah!! I don't know how I did it and part of me feels guilty because apart from the 2 months before the exams where I was frantically not revising but sadly learning everything I'd missed the lectures for, I did very little work.

- Went to Kate's graduation. She was very clever and got a first. I watched her go through many weird St. Andrews traditions during the ceremony, including listening to most of it in Latin and being hit over the head with a dead guy's old pants. Et superted, Kate. Et superted. I got a bit emotional when she joined the academics procession at the end complete with hood as a REAL academic, and realised that as an adult female it's obligatory to shed at least one tear at any kind of ceremony. I feel very old and mumsy now.

- Have been having a battle with the landlord over rent. We've been living in a bit of a shithole for the past 12 months and there is a massive damp problem. Emily and I decided we'd ask for £50 off each and for him to pay for all dehumidifiers etc. Had a minor spat with other housemate Lou because she wants the whole thing back, which I think is a bit much considering he's responded quickly to all our problems (granted, fixing them rather cack-handedly by sending his simple nephew round to block up leaks, and occasionally causing even more catastrophes by employing cowboy workmen). She's contesting the rent individually and if he says no (which he probably will considering the 2 other tenants have come to an agreement with him) I think she'll probably do a runner with the last month's rent. I'd rather get the deposit back myself.

- Currently preparing for my own graduation (haircut, highlights, MANICURE!). Many embarrassing photos are in store for me that day but on a lighter note I'll probably get to shake Bill Bryson's hand!!!! Apparently he likes to make as many congregations as possible so fingers crossed he makes mine! In the evening my family and MY BOYFRIEND'S FAMILY are going out for dinner TOGETHER!!! I literally feel about 30 and very nervous for some reason, even though I know it'll probably all go fine.

When I get back to Manchester I plan to look for a flat and start working/midwifery preparation. This time next year I'll be looking at women's naughty bits and taking blood pressure!
It's all making me feel very old.

Hope everyone's having fun!
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Like woah. [08 Apr 2007|04:48pm]
I'm becoming a stranger to these parts. I'll probably have to start asking directions soon...

Hmm, my life recently...
- Have eaten a lot
- Have got into Manchester Uni and City Uni in London to study Midwifery next year but I'm definitely going to Manchester, starting March 2008.
- Grown mushrooms on our kitchen ceiling (because of the damp problem in the student house in Durham. My parents run a very respectable household. Our Durham landlord's a crap old man.)
- Grown mould on my bedroom ceiling (purely for recreational purposes, nothing to do with damp.)
- Grown mould in several cups of neglected tea.
- Had an hour-long conversation about Paul O'Grady with my boyfriend's nana.
- Had a couple of colds.
- Had several near-misses regarding handing in uni coursework and sworn blind each time I would never leave it to the last minute again (ha!).
- Gone to Chichester (beautiful place. full of rich people.)
- Got a(nother) hair-cut.
- Have been going out with Dave for almost 6 months now and it's still going well. This may seem like peanuts to some of you, but for me, Queen of the Short Term and ill-advised liaison, seriously, it's a long time.
- Have started thinking about moving out in the summer and buying a fish called Fergus and a cat called Dirk.

In a nutshell.

Hope everyone's ok.
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[18 Feb 2007|11:59am]
I think this is possibly the longest I've ever gone without making a post. I really must be growing up. Either that or it really is final year.

Been working hard. Most of the marks I've got back this year have been in the mid-to-high sixties so with any luck I should be able to get out of here with a 2:1. I've got 2 interviews next month for Midwifery courses, one in Manchester and one in London. I really hope I get into Manchester for various reasons - it's home, accommodation is cheaper (I'm not living with my parents!!!), and I'll be marginally closer to the Geordie. I'll have friends in either city so it doesn't really matter, but I think Dave and I really want to make a go of it next year, and the further away I am the less likely it is to work out. Especially seeing as he has an irrational hate for London already, having never been there in his life. Strange boy.

It's all pretty scary imagining myself as a trainee midwife. Think of all the muff I'll have to look up day in day out! I'm also fairly squeamish which I assume I'll have to sort out before getting my hands dirty. I'd rather not make passing out embarrassingly a daily occurrence.

Valentine's Day was uneventful seeing as neither of us go in for it particularly. We got each other cards, I saw him for about an hour in Gosforth for a coffee (which he bought! oh, the romance!) and he sent me a picture gift of a bog roll on Facebook. Now THAT is amore.

Sarah and Scott are moving in together in July which is lovely news. The initial fright at the thought of them having only been together half the amount of time Dave and I have has subsided. It's a big step but if they feel they're ready for it, good luck to them! It seems strange though, because I hadn't even considered anything like it. I'm absolutely 100% categorically not ready for anything like that. I'm still too selfish and attached to my independence and I'm pretty sure Dave feels the same. The fact that a lot of my friends seem to be settling down does make me feel a tad old, though...

So that's about it for now and possibly for the next year or so if my recent posts have been anything to go by.
I do still read everyone's journals regularly, though, and even comment occasionally (gasp!) so don't think I've forgotten you all!!!
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Absence makes the heart grow fonder!!! [29 Dec 2006|02:50pm]
I feel I have neglected you, oh Livejournal. You have been cruelly replaced by the wonder that is the book of Face.

But I still read about all you guys and keep up to date with what's going on. I just never post my own entries so wouldn't be surprised if absolutely none of you are interested in what I have to say anymore. I'm not even that interested.

Going to Newcastle tomorrow to spend the New Year with the significant other (bloody hell, I have been spending too long on Facebook) and apparently his parents have got me a Christmas present so I'm now officially a part of the family. It also means I have to get them something. Arse.

The Christmas holidays have been spent mainly breaking TVs and getting new ones, then getting old ones back again only to find they're still broken so part-exchanging them for new ones. And finally figuring out how to work the DVD Recorder which we've had for about a thousand years.

Kate is also officially the best sister in the world as she got me a Neighbours: Defining Moments DVD with all the births, marriages and deaths!!!!! Very festive! Nothing like a good death at Christmas.

Looking forward to various get-togethers before going back to Durham.

Hope everyone's had a good one and will celebrate the New Year in style!!!!
xxxxxxx
1 Ow! That fucking hurt| Bite Me!

Sorry [08 Nov 2006|05:58pm]
Yes I know I've not posted in ages and this'll really annoy everyone but I've just finished an essay and need some mindless drivel to occupy myself with don't judge me...Collapse )

In quick news:
- fourth year sucks cos there's so much work and no time to do it in.
- I've lost my library card which is proving most unhelpful.
- I've spent way too much money on shit this year.
- our house is really badly maintained. it's damp and my bedroom has a leak. our electricity bills are going to be massive because of the blow heaters and de-humidifiers we have to keep using. AAARRRGGGHHH!!!
- on an up note I'm no longer single. It still feels really weird but he's a very nice guy called Dave who Kate has already had the pleasure of vetting. It's going very well at the moment :)

How are we all??? xxx
Bite Me!

Corr! [24 Sep 2006|03:49pm]
Well, holy mother of mong. I can't actually believe I have to go back to Durham on Friday. After spending 6 months back here doing not much at all and generally farting away my year abroad, it seems weird going back into a situation where I'm going to actually have to work. Bloody hard too, seeing as it's my final year.

I still have so much to do - completely ignoring everything I have to buy before I go back, there's tons of reading to do and a year abroad essay to complete (which needs so much more work doing to it - why oh why did I leave it until the last minute?!?!??!).

Currently going through UCAS applying for Midwifery courses. It looks like I'll probably end up in London because I don't think I meet the entry requirements for the Manchester course. Still, I've always wanted to live in London and I've got friends there, so it could be a good thing. My personal statement for it sounds a little bit cheesy - I'm not too sure I wanted to go down the whole "I just want to make a difference" route but, no matter how many times I screwed it up and re-started it, invariably that's how it ended up. I guess all personal statements are a bit like that, though. Especially for the health professions - job satisfaction, personal rather than financial rewards blah blah blah. I managed to cram in all the relevant experience I've ever had, which is a bonus, especially the bit about me being a nanny (even though it was informal and only for about 2 weeks all in all!)
I really hope I get in *somewhere*. I've never really had this much focus for anything else ever, and I think I'd be really good at it.

Speaking of which, congratulations on broomster and caz on their new arrival - the pics of which only made me more excited about possibly being able to help future new mums squeeze out massive baby beasts.

Got my mp3 player working again. It just needed a good charge. Well, don't we all?

If anyone wants to come and stay in Durham you're more than welcome! I have a floor!!!!

Right. Packing.
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[21 Aug 2006|11:30pm]
Ok so I'm a rubbish updater.

In the past two weeks I've been to Italy and Wales. I had a very good time in both countries. Nothing much more to be said.

I ate delicious nachos with veggie chilli for tea tonight. Mmmm. And that, my friends, is what I call excitement.

Ooh, also, I was sick the other day. The fun just never stops. I'm like some kind of whirlwind or something.
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My grandad [06 Aug 2006|05:20pm]
"That was the problem with Adam. He just wanted an easy life, sitting in a deckchair in the Garden of Eden with a gin and tonic or a Pimm's or some bloody thing.
Is it any wonder that the rest of the world is the kick in the arse from his bloody stupid idea? Because he wanted an easy life, the stupid bugger!"

There is still time for my grandad to become a superstar.
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[27 Jul 2006|09:52pm]
Why do I even bother anymore?

I'm exhausted.
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Scorrre. [23 Jul 2006|08:48pm]
Despite feeling a bit rough, having had about 3 hours sleep and feeling a bit sick, I just successfully made Sunday dinner of cod wrapped in pancetta with new potatoes and mange-tout and raspberry-brandy-infused apricots!

How brilliant am I?

That's the first post I've made in about a million years and it's about fish.
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[06 Jul 2006|08:15pm]
You're a big arse, headache. A big fat hairy arse.
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This Life Outrage [24 Jun 2006|12:01pm]
Just watched the last ever episode of This Life on DVD and quite frankly was appalled. It was just getting interesting and then it ended. Warren was just getting fit and then it ENDED! Nothing was resolved, all the loose ends were just left dangling there.

I just feel so at a loss! I don't know if Milly and Egg are going to sort things out, or if Miles is going to finally admit to himself that he can't live happily with Francesca and that he'd only really be happy with Anna - or if it's Anna who gives in and tells Miles how she really feels.
I don't even really know if Joe and Kiera get together, or if Kiera gets her dream job as receptionist.
I wanted to know exactly what injuries Rachel had when Milly smacked her one.
All I know is that Ferdy's in love with Lenny - and who cares about that Mick-Hucknall-resembling moose!!!!!

It's ironic that I bought the This Life DVDs because I felt I'd been missing out on a big part of my 90s TV teenagedom, and now I feel even more out of the loop than I ever have before just because I don't know what the FUCK IS GOING ON!!!!!!!!

Trust me, if you haven't watched This Life before, don't start. As you can tell, it's just frustrating.
6 Ow! That fucking hurts| Bite Me!

[17 Jun 2006|10:29am]
Lovely weekend in Paris followed by a fairly traumatic train journey experience which everyone concerned has already talked about - involving striking French train workers, missing our flights, fainting, fist fights, lots of paper flapping, disgruntled men busting windows out of their frames, tears and frantic people thinking they were going to die. I thought I was going to puke all over a man's face at one point (we were all so close together, the direction of said puke would have been unavoidable).

I could have made a whole dramatic post about that but I can't be arsed and to be fair on all you guys, I doubt any of you could be arsed reading about it either.

Excellent piece on Radio 4 today. A listener rang in saying that everyone really MUST read THE fundamental book about knitting: Knitting With Dog Hair by Kendall Crolius. The slogan is possibly the best in the universe - "Better A Sweater From A Dog You Love Than From A Sheep You'll Never Meet".

Google it - it's a real book! I might buy it.
1 Ow! That fucking hurt| Bite Me!

[03 Jun 2006|03:35pm]
Stolen from TimCollapse )

Last night was ok, but none of us were drunk enough to even go near 5th Ave and I ended up getting very irritated indeed at things I would, under usual 5th Ave circumstances, have found very amusing. But when you're relatively sober and get an orange VS Sorted poured down your back, it's ALWAYS time to leave.

Mental note: Melba toast and marmite = YUM!
4 Ow! That fucking hurts| Bite Me!

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